Its Never Enough


          Super Bowl XLV11 is only days away, San Fran’s flashy 49ers faces Baltimore’s  Dark Vader- Esque Ravens. It should be a hard hitting affair that will offer more than enough highlight clips by the time the clock hit all zeros and the whole “I’m going to Disney Land” promos begin.

           Sure this is a unique  and quite intriguing matchup that has CBS execs smiling miles long doting over the record breaking ratings that this super bowl will surely haul in. By the way Beyonce will perform at half time and she will be singing in her own voice, im sure of it.

            Its the first Super Bowl  that features two head coaches on opposite teams that are biological brothers. The Niners have the whole Kaepernicksanity  going for them the whole complete package, He can run faster than a NASCAR vehicle and can throw a football deep and precise like a USAF drone plane while Baltimore has the whole Ray Lewis insanity working for or against them, depending on who is voicing their opinions towards him.

            And I’ll be honest, it really matters little Okay, maybe it’ll matter a lot to see which team wins the game since all them polyester suit wearing bookies in Vegas and everyone that has placed a bet on the game cares passionately, but in hindsight (which isn’t always 20/10) ‘this’ Super Bowl is all about Ray Lewis, Make no mistake about it.

            There’s the Liberal view of him being Baltimore’s Messiah He speaks with a robust passion that motivates his team mates who seem to have a obsequence gleam in their eyes about their imposing leader’s speeches. This is also Ray’s last game -allegedly. The idea that this will be Ray Lewis final game adds that much curiosity to the game. And in all story lines the finality is always attractive.

             Then there’s the conservative view that sees one thing about Ray Lewis “He’s a murderer.  A thug, plain and simple”  A few New England Patriot football player’s wives made headlines on Twitter by expressing disdainment  towards Ray Lewis after Baltimore beat up on New England. A good ass whoppen always seem to bring out the worst in the loosing side. I’m just saying it does not matter that Ray Lewis was never charged nor convicted of murder. We live in one world that often has two or more different views or takes on a single event,  affect us all differently. Perhaps we all are egotistical enigmas who caters to differences out of ignorance?  They say in a world full of blind people, the one eyed man is king. But what if there was two one eyed men, Each seeing out of opposite eyes, Would we get them to agree on what they see? “Perhaps not”, so says History.

           One of the men who died that night years ago on Super Bowl night in Atlanta, had a pregnant girlfriend that would later give birth to a child. Ray Lewis gave her a settlement that was reported to be worth $2 million dollars. She recently said in an interview “I have nothing bad to say about Ray Lewis”  Might have been the money talking? Or she was being sincere? The other man who died that night still has family back in Ohio that hates Ray Lewis so much it pains them to hear his name.

             Why is it the courts found Ray Lewis not responsible for killing anyone. When Ray actually testified against two of his friends who was with him that tragic night. Both of Ray’s friends went to trial for murder and both were acquitted., Ray Lewis a snitch? Perhaps. Ray Lewis guilty of murder? The courts said he wasn’t. So why do half of the public (haters) feel that he is still a murderer?

              I’m reminded of Anthony Graves, months after his release from Jail after spending 18 years in Prison and death row for a gruesome slaughter of nearly a half dozen people many of whom were children. A special prosecutor declared Graves innocence. His co defendant before his execution admitted he lied on Graves and that Graves was not even apart of the crime, Yet, when the grieving mother too whom whose children were killed, was asked about Graves exoneration. She said “I don’t care what the courts say. I know he had something to do with killing my babies”.

             Then there is Michael Morton., This man spent 25 long years in prison for killing his wife, No evidence linked this married husband to his wife’s murder, Other than a theory by the D.A, that Morton killed his wife because she wasn’t as sexually freaky’ to his likings. TWENTY FIVE years later he was exonerated and the evidence the police had for twenty five years that was never tested, revealed the real killer two -decades and a half later.  Michael regained his freedom. He aged a lot loosing years that he can never physically nor mentally get back. He had to learn how to use a cell phone, and how to wear a pain of pants that wasn’t a pair of prison pull ups, and even though the real killer of this crime is awaiting trial, Michael’s ex sister in law still says “Michael killed my sister, I’m sure of it”.


            I mean men and women who find themselves within the penal laws of unjust incarceration spend their who existence to fight injustice within their cases just so they an prove their innocence and regain their freedom, and those lucky enough or fortunate to succeed where so many has and will fail, will still face dogmatism instead of an apology by their persecutors.  Don’t get me wrong, the loss of a loved one is still a tragic and heat breaking event that psychologically becomes another layer of flesh for those who carry those heavy burdens around.

             I’ve had a loved one murdered, so I can empathize those who fought to prove their innocence, especially when evidence now clears them of any wrong doing, I don’t care if you are a D.A a cop, or a judge, they all are people first. Being’s that are flawed like everyone else. Persons who accuse others of wrong doings for a living, as their profession, meaning it becomes only natural for them to say “He or she did it! Without a caution of validity to the charge.

             We live in a world that fuels itself on racism, classicism, sexism and cultural divisions,. All of which is breeding grounds for pseudo’s, mistaken identities, spotty creditability and ultimately wrongful convictions and executions.

             I sit on Death Row innocent of a crime that was never a crime. It took me years to get to the point where I care title, if at all, about what society or the media thinks of me. I’m not playing in any Super Bowl and I’m sure not giving anyone millions I don’t have. I don’t have any in-laws that wants my head on a platter. I don’t have a desire to prove my innocence for ‘you’ whoever ‘you’ may be. I just want to be me to fight for my truth. To free myself, cause at the end of the day, I sit and have sat all these years in this cage alone. Just me, myself and I. No one who is free can ever understand what it feels like to live as I do.

             So to Ray Lewis, should Baltimore win the Super Bowl and he goes to the fifty yard line to look “upwards” to give thanks, just know that when you take the Uniform off It’s Never Enough!

Thats what I learned.

Written by Charles Chucky Mamou/ jan/feb 2013

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